Pieces of Me

Less

Here we are. Six months into what was once a New Year. To say that time seems to be flying is quite the understatement. Time is on fast forward it seems. I look back on the first post I wrote this year and despite all that has happened since then; I’d like to think that I am still on track. I still have the eagerness and motivation to fill my days with more pauses, more appreciation and less anxiety.

The spiritual and insightful chain of events that spurred from the BHB (un-)conference weekend cannot be underestimated this year. I walked away with a shift in my perception over many things. One of those things was the idea that I need to do less. Cut the ties of all that weighs me down, drags me down even. I walked out of that conference asking myself “what are you going to stop doing today?” and I am still asking that question.

Less

It is certainly not a ground breaking, nor new question to ask. Maybe it is even a question that has been asked a thousand times before. But it is a question I am seeking new answers for. A question that I am seeking immediate answers for. The tiny voice in my heart lately has been whispering “the things you are going to stop doing are just as important” and a few weeks ago I actually listened to that voice. In one sweep I cut down my hours at work. Just like that. Stop.

But I did not cut out one job to fill those hours with other work. In this craving for less, I am craving my family and especially the connection with my boys so much more. So in a moment of passion, I set free one whole day in my week for no commitment, no schedule and no rules. Just me, the boys, dinner, cosy snuggles on the couch watching TV, free to do as we please, when we please.

If you had asked me a year ago if this was even possible, I would have been in stitches from the hilarity of what would have seemed completely impossible. Yet everything is possible.

Less

Every day I not only hold onto the power of possibility, I surrender to it.

“Do you trust me?” asks the Universe.
“Oh I trust you, blindfolded and bound, I trust you.”

For it is within this trust that I have found my new sense of lightness. My sense of being empowered by my choices and energised by the path I travel on. Less is not only starting to feel like so much more, I crave this less with a hunger and passion that I never had for more.

What do you want to stop doing in your life? What do you crave less of?

  • LydiaCLee

    This is lovely – I can’t stop – I just take breaks (to focus and recharge). I’m not meant to be writing for 2 weeks and I’ve failed at that and it’s only day 4! But I am being a little less on the internet…reminding my kids how much they hate me when I get in their face and want to play board games…;)

    • I think being less on the internet is something we should all do…hmmmm is there another post coming?

  • The Plumbette

    You have to make a decision either way to live how you want. I love that you’ve recognised what you want and have found a way to achieve it. Spending time with your boys sounds like a normal thing to achieve when you’re a mum but when you juggle so many balls it can often be put to the side. I’ve loved spending quality time with my girls and not working. I love the cuddles and watching their minds tick as they play with their toys. I stop in wonder and think they were my babies and now they are growing into little girls with beautiful and strong personalities. How blessed are we to be mothers yet we rarely stop to enjoy the full blessing of their presence in our lives. X lovely post Josefa, as always. 🙂

    • I think being a mother is one of the greatest of blessings, my boys – their personalities, their quirks, their stories – these are everything that make me crave everything else less xx

  • Congratulations Josefa. I’m sure your day will bring just what you crave. It is hard to stop or cut back. We think everything is so important in our lives, but if we are truly honest with ourselves there are really only a small handful of things that are. It is taking the leap, having the courage to take that step. x

    • Being honest with ourselves and really listening to that inner voice, then taking action can be quite a powerful step x

  • Good on your for being able to make that change! So many of us struggle to balance the commitments and expectations with our desires and what we know deep down we must do for our family. I’m sure your renewed freedom will be well spent making memories. xx

    • I love the idea of making memories, and snuggles on the couch and in summer – long walks along the beach – sounds just blissful to me xx

  • Renee at Mummy, Wife, Me

    Josefa, I think it is wonderful that the BHB conference had such an amazing impact on you. Good on you for changing your perspective and sticking to it. It is one thing to talk about changing, but then another to do it, and stick to it. Your days at home with the boys sound like absolutely bliss. I wrote this in my comment on your Kiki&Tea post yesterday that I have done something crazy this week and taken two days off work. The kids are at daycare and I am home here by myself. The kitchen dishes haven’t been done and washing needs to be done, but I am going to take some time out for myself today. I will do a little blog reading, which I love, a little writing, a lot of eating and watching tv 🙂 xx

    • Renee, well done for taking these two days off! Tell me, what have you been up? I cannot even imagine two days to myself….

  • I’m trying to do the same thing. At the moment I’m aiming to have at least one day where I’m not online and instead I’m aiming to reconnect with my life, my family and most importantly myself. I’ve also been limiting my Facebook time to just 15 minutes a day. So far the blog is surviving. 🙂

    • I think my connection online is something I need to look at – if not next – very soon. I have a friend who compeltely disconnected her life from FB and feels so much better from it xx

      • I often disconnect to reconnect. I’m not sure as a blogger we can ever really completely disconnect. I had a social media free weekend once and it almost killed my hubby. I ended up rearranging and decorating a few rooms with his help.

  • What a great question. Hmmm I want less of being unmotivated about the things I know will fill my soul. Less fear of trying and being knocked back. And less of being reactionary in those moments.
    Great post! Food for thought.

    • I simply love what you wish for less, raw honest and powerful, thank you for sharing that here xx

  • What a beautiful post and how simple is it to make sweeping changes that can completely change how you live life.

  • This is so brilliant Josefa! It is a great question, and I am so happy that the answers have helped you feel more settled. I love my days of nothing. Myself, and my boys, really need days stretching before them with nothing so to fully relax. This is why I love school holidays so much. Lots of nothing.

    • Nothing is often underestimated in our society – shunned at even. I think that days of nothing need to be held in great regard xx

  • I have no idea what I can do less of, honestly? Maybe less time on my phone? That’s something I really need to focus on.
    I love that you now have an entire day for the boys. That’s great. 🙂

    • They are beside themselves Jess, amazing how one change can affect so many people – especially little people. Tomorrow is my day off – can’t wait xx

  • Denise Mooney

    I love this question. As my little one is getting older I’m trying to work more, which is good. I haven’t quite found the right balance yet, but I love the days when it’s just me and him and no commitments. Bliss! I’m delighted for you that you’ve got a day with your boys.

  • I need to work less but then working and telling people’s stories makes me feel great. I’m trying to be more present when the kids are around, eg stop being on the computer when they are in the room!

  • What a fantastic thing to do! I NEED to have a day will less commitment more freedom…

  • TeganMC

    I think I need to do less of the staying stuck in my own head and more of the living. This is a great post.

    • Oh Tegan what a great thing to wish less of – I spend most of my stuck in my own head. It feels so light when I do get out of there xx

  • I am all for this concept, although I am a very attracted to ‘doing’, as many bloggers/writers probably are. I crave less technology, and more connection. More eye contact, less screen time. x

  • Good on you for giving up that day to just connect with your boys. What an investment. I want less technology surrounding me, or at least in the times when I’m not on it. I miss old fashioned eye contact (like Zanni), and smiles and conversations where people are fully attentive (and not scrolling in their phones). I don’t think the world is going to suddenly have less to do with their technology however, but I can encouragement my own household to invest in other things other than screens.

  • Loree

    I’d love to spend less time at work definitely. And more time daydreaming and doing fun things with my boy.

  • I often spend too much time in my own mind. It’s nice to get out for awhile x

  • Samantha Turnbull

    Domestic stuff. I love being a mum, but the stuff (aka housewifely duties) that come with it is what I crave less of. Time for a cleaner maybe 🙂

  • Love this post Josefa, it is like you are writing it for me. I need to give up some things and you are so right, they are just as important to give up than doing something!

  • How lovely to put that time aside, Josefa. I think we could all do with more of that.

  • Karen

    I crave fewer needless appointments! They always seem important when I schedule them but really – they’re just not!

  • I want to crave less food that I don’t need.

  • Oh Josefa, what a wonderful thing to do. Setting aside a ‘free day’ with your boys sounds just perfect.

  • Mrs W

    I’m with you on this sentiment right now. For the last 9 months I filled life with every passing opportunity I could, partly due to curiosity, partly due to wanting that sense of achievement. But it wore me out, and I swore once it was all done I would simplify and walk on by more often. I’ve already forced myself to do it a couple of times lately, and it is hard, but ultimately it’s a relief to not burden myself with unnecessary obligations!

  • I feel like this post was meant for me! I am starting to move towards simplifying the things/stuff/craziness that has taken over my life. I have some big goals for this year and the little stuff has a habit of creeping in, taking over and yet, none of it is important. Im putting “what I am not going to do today?” on my fridge. Powerful stuff.

  • Everytime I read about someone who has stolen bak time in their week to do something they love or spend with people they love I high five the air around me. Good on you lovely girl – this is so awesome xx

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